Early last year I wanted to make a fun, free track for immediate release to announce my new collaborative project with Nolely Nole - still the best kept secret to move away from Halifax.  We had a handful of tracks mostly laid down, and a few more in the hopper, so I jacked this beat from the Freeway & Jake One Stimulus Package album just to come out all exuberant and psyched!

And then we forgot to ever put it out, except for a not-quite-finished version that made it onto his “Pretty Young Thang” mixtape.  This is a better version than that.

Here are the lyrics:

[Jesse]
Jesse D - gyrlz, they love my heavy “D” like holy shit!  My homie told me brevity’s the soul of wit, so I initial “D” officially and sign my name in a smooth stroke/scribble motion.  Even thought I moved out, still a Scotian!  I feel emotions when I’m spilling potions over hallowed, real dirt.

Bad meaning good - no Battlefield Earth.  Casualty alert! Top competitor!  Fell into some bull and got dropped from Matador.  In Ottawa, but not a Senator.  Send a letter to the editor to spread the word - I bet it works!

Fresh-cut fries getting served with better cheddar curds.  We’re ahead of the curve.  Y’all don’t dance, so we’re Men At Work!  Neutron bombing just a soupcon; soup’s on!  I like my rappers like I like my coffee: 2 Black 2 Strong.

You need to cut it out like a coupon, and save yourself the trouble of a cameo appearance where you play yourself.

[hook, then Jesse again]
Young Nolely, the unholy! Penny-ante rummoli!  I will always watch his back because his mom told me!  But no strings, no cages, I’m no Stromboli.  No Strombolopoulis, no Mom and Pop, I’m just the humble opposite.

The child is father to the man.  Your style is off and popping, kid, why bother with a plan?  The product that you thought of in advance is just an albatross, I guess.  Whether the fans’ll cop depends on what the album cost to press.  ”Awesome” and “fresh” are not contested terms.  I’ve learned that Vick’s Vap-O-Rub can cause the chest to burn…

I’m less concerned with getting sales, and more with turning critics pale and changing lives like books that you read in jail.  Eden Kaill!

We can fail, or we can reach people and even help.  You might laugh.  We strike back at empires bailing out the life raft - you’re like rats on a sinking ship, chickenshit!  Bad thinking, blinking during brinkmanship!

[hook, sample of Casual, then Nolely]
Hand me a cigarette!  Time to lick off shots right here, right now - get the trigger wet, and say “fuck, shit, piss,” and get your parents upset a bit.  Keep it clean? (No-ole!)  No fuck?  Now you celibate?  Hell to the naw, so sound the alarm.  Cazals and a broad on each of my arms, so stand and applaud, then bow to the god.

Good lord!  Flyer than a broomstick driven by two boobs and a cute nude chick, so get off of my huge dick!  Hail to the king, and your boo get the boomstick; that’s sure thing.

So! So! So Scotian, no shirt thing.  Catch your favourite rappers and hang ten - no surfing!  So fuck y’all… suck balls… I’m gonna go pound skins: Vic Firth-ing!